Sometimes fate takes you by the hand and walks you to a place you had no intention of going. When I start to feel mistreated by life; when I see more clouds than sunlight, when I forget how fortunate I am, I look back and think about my year with Derris.
For nearly twenty years, I taught at Chester High School. The high school building is divided into circular pods of six classrooms each. For several years, my classroom was across the pod from the Special Needs classroom. Other than an occasional wave or visit, I was busy teaching Honors III English plus four other classes. I rarely had time to interact outside my classroom.
One year, at the beginning of school, I was invited across the pod to a party for one of the Special Needs students. I was hesitant, as an outsider, but I but was so lovingly greeted by the class that I was glad I had accepted the invitation. There was lots of food but I noticed that one very short heavyset black child had carrots instead of the usual treats. Asking “why” set my life on a road to understanding.
There is a Zen saying, “When the pupil is ready, the master appears.” The teacher told me about Derris. He was just four feet tall and weighed over 200 pounds. He had, I was told, Prader-Willi Syndrome which causes obesity, shortness in height and some intellectual disability. While he looked and acted much younger, Derris was seventeen. He was in constant danger of becoming so overweight that his heart couldn’t handle the pressure.
“We have set up a routine of exercise and walking and keep him away from food,” I was told. “His illness makes him constantly hungry and even at home they must keep food locked away. We find a student volunteer to walk with him every day but have not yet found one for this year.”
“I’ll walk him until you do,” I said, caught up in the moment. “What do I need to do?”
“There’s not much to it. Just walk him out the door and maybe half-way around the building and back. Judge the distance by how he seems to feel but don’t be afraid to push him to go a little farther.”
And with that first step, my hundred-mile journey began. Derris and I walked half-way around the building the first day and, since it was no trouble and I needed to walk too, I took on the job full time. Every day we would walk and gradually increase our distance. Derris would always hold my hand throughout the entire walk and I would do most of the talking. His limited communication skills made him a good listener.
Halfway around the building we would pass the oval quarter-mile track and after less than a week, we decided to try a lap. We rested a little about half-way around but we made it. Derris had such a sweet disposition and a smile that held nothing back so we would always have students from the PE classes waving and saying “Hi!” to him. After only a week or so, we were completing the quarter mile loop without stopping. While our talks consisted mostly of me telling him things about my life, sometimes he would ask questions or answer mine.
When it rained or got too cold, we would walk inside the building. We stepped off the distance so we could walk as far inside as we did outside. We would have to walk when classes were in session so students in the hall would not slow us down and Derris would constantly increase his pace.
By the end of the first semester, Derris and I were walking to the track, taking two laps and walking back to class at a brisk pace still holding hands. He was always willing to work a little harder and would sometimes race forward as fast as his short legs would take him and giggle as he dragged me along.
That year was a strange time for me. I was in my third or fourth year of marriage and we were still in the honeymoon stage so I didn’t like the time it took to get to and from Chester. I had recently had surgery and that slowed me down a little. I was teaching four English classes and a Video Editing/Broadcasting class using early digital editing equipment we had acquired through a grant. I was also producing a morning news broadcast through the school video system. Sometimes I felt like I needed to be three places at once.
As part of my continuing education, I had completed the teacher mentor program at Winthrop University but I had not applied for a student teacher. I didn’t feel like I had time to mentor anyone. One day, in the middle of my year with Derris, the Winthrop Education Department called and said they had a student teacher they were having difficulty placing with a mentor. Despite my misgivings, I agreed and expected the worst. Since I hadn’t met her beforehand, I didn’t know what to expect from the unplaceable student teacher.
I was in the broadcast studio finishing a morning news show and sending students back to class when I got a call to the office to meet my new student teacher. When I got there, there was already a greeting committee of assistant principals standing around and I had to force my way into the group. Ashley was a strikingly beautiful twenty-year-old. I know beauty when I see it, I married into the motherload. Ashley wore a knee-length skirt, a modest blouse and heels and I had to pry her away from the impromptu office greeting committee. I assumed she had dressed up for the first day on the job but to the delight of much of the male faculty and staff, she dressed that way every day.
Ashley was enthusiastic, confident and competent and after a few weeks of observing, I let her take over a couple of classes. It was a chance for me to produce the morning news without having to run back to class and it gave me time to breathe in the middle of a tough year.
Derris and I continued to improve. He was losing some weight and so was I. We had extended our walks to a mile and both of us looked forward to our time together. We walked during my planning period and one day Ashley asked to join us. Derris, of course, was delighted. Despite his developmental handicaps, he was beginning to understand the difference between boys and girls. Walking between us and holding both our hands, Derris would, despite his short legs, pull us around the track for at least four laps and sometimes more.
On rainy or cold days, our walks through the building became a little more interesting. Shamelessly, on those days, the principal, two assistant principals and the School Resource Officer would choose to meet in front of the office for the duration of our walk. It was the center point of the building and we would pass four or five times as we completed our mile. The principals would pretend to be involved in some important discussions but I knew, and so did Ashley, that they were there to watch us walk past…well, not US. Once, the SRO confided in me, “Mike, I have tried but I can’t even make myself speak to her.”
After two months, Ashley successfully completed her student teaching and the principals returned to their offices. Ashley was, beyond her physical attractiveness, a natural teacher who came to every class prepared. She would be a star teacher in any school she chose and I can only guess that she was hard to place with a mentor teacher because she was so intimidating.
Derris and I soldiered on, trying to improve on every walk. I think we were both glad to get back to what was our time. He had reached his last year at Chester and one of the students who worked with the special needs class as an aide, invited him to the Senior Prom. I drove a Honda Element, not really limousine quality, but offered to take them to and from the Prom. I drove to Chester and met him and his date. She looked great in her prom dress and Derris had on a tuxedo and sported a top hat. He danced with several girls and when the time came to name the prom King, Derris was chosen. He was not chosen because of his handicap but because his courageous attitude and ever-present smile brightened the lives of everyone he came near.
Our time together was at an end. Derris was finishing his senior year and he would have to transition out of the class and into the real world. It would not be easy for him and I was surprised how difficult it was for me to give up our time together. During our walks, he had taught me to be more patient, and more understanding. From Derris I had learned how loving and caring a special needs person can be and how someone who was given so little in life can give so much to others.
It is true that “When the student is ready, the master appears.” Just when I needed him the most, Derris took me by the hand, pulled me for over a hundred miles and, along the way, taught me much about kindness and courage.
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